Look. There’s the lady with the triplets…..
Yes that’s me. Local celebrity. I am the lady with the triplets. Oh. And an older one. All boys. OMG. Imagine.
Well that is what I am hoping to put an end to and enlighten instead. When I found out I was expecting triplets, I struggled to find a nice light-hearted positive survival guide. I had so many worries, questions, concerns and hopes but no focus point for addressing it. So I hope to create it. So those ladies out there who, like I once did, discover they are expecting triplets, may not feel so alone. And I am hoping that any expectant parents of multiples will take some comfort in what I will say, and indeed any parents of a singleton may find parts useful, because I too was once a parent of a singleton.
So my main aim here is to enlighten and hopefully help you out on a few areas by reading how it did it. I also want to put a positive spin on the whole multiples thing. It has so many bad reactions and negativity which is proven by the negative comments outweighing the wonderfully good comments I have had. Also, I have read too many articles from other multiple parents – twins, triplets, which do not read well and are certainly of no hope whatsoever if you are sitting there , pregnant with multiples trying to work out what exactly it means. Reading those whilst pregnant with multiples yourself would make you dread it. So for starters, I want to say it is really not that bad. No, not that bad at all. I hope that you will have times when you can sit back, breathe, and realise just how wonderful it is and how lucky you and your family are.
I have really enjoyed my ‘baby years’ and know I have been extremely lucky for many reasons. So I decided to stay away from prescribing rules and routines as you will need to work out your own routine. Not only everyone is different, but everyone’s situation is different and therefore everyone’s ‘madhouse’ will be different. A ‘madhouse’ is defined as a wild, confused and often noisy place. How mad your madhouse is depends on how good you are at managing it. The ease and effectiveness at which you do this will be defined by what I consider the ‘madhouse’ factors. Before getting into the madhouse factors, the key thing I want to get across is that is doesn’t need to be that bad. You do not have to spend days on end sitting around feeding babies in old tracksuit bottoms. I read so many articles of people like this. And it doesn’t need to be like that. You will get sleep. You can be in charge. You just need to train yourself to manage your madhouse effectively.
When I found out I was expecting triplets, my emotions were everywhere. I knew our lives would change, but I did not know what much. I struggled to tell people because I couldn’t cope with their reactions. The negative reactions such as ‘Oh my god how are you going to cope?’, didn’t help because I didn’t know the answers, and the positive reactions such as ‘Oh how wonderful, It’s going to be lovely, What a blessing’ didn’t help either because a multiple pregnancy is considered higher risk, and my pregnancy had its own initial complications. So it can be a lonely time. I found it hard when family wanted to tell extended family because it was exciting, and wonderful and how very cute, 3 babies at once, what pushchair will you get…. I couldn’t, wouldn’t, let myself think like that. I had a job to do. I had to get those babies as far as I could. I was worried that three babies, may become two, or one, or none. I wasn’t worried about how I would cope if I had three babies. I was worried about how I would cope if I didn’t.
So the key thing here is breathe. Don’t panic. Don’t feel you need to tell everyone unless you are ready to deal with the reactions. And when you are ready, you can move on to how you are going to a manage this. Yes it is hard work, but it has be never been as hard as I imagined it would be. It is not impossible. It can be enjoyable. I wish when I was pregnant with my triplets there was a positive survival guide out there, someone to show me it can be done. It can, believe me.
To set this out from the beginning, I believe the key to my immense enjoyment of my life over the last 7 years has been the R word. The Routine. Love it or hate it (and I guarantee babies love it), it really is the key. And to follow a successful routine, you need to be the most organised you have ever been in your life.
I will take you through my last 7 years in a positive but honest way from the day I found out, to giving birth, to feeding routines, to weaning, to the toddler years, basically through key stages to where we are now. Which is I now have four boys, aged 8 and 6. The fact that there are triplets in there doesn’t really matter. The issue now is I am a mum of 4 boys. And that is a whole different ball game.